


Inevitably

by tusslee



Category: Banana Bus Squad, H2OVanoss - Fandom
Genre: Aquariums, Beaches, First Kiss, Fluff, Jon has a daughter, M/M, but they love each other - Freeform, they're both idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-29 22:25:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11450304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tusslee/pseuds/tusslee
Summary: “It’s always been you, y’know? Even when I didn’t know what you looked like, when you were just a voice and a character in a game. I’ve always gravitated toward you. You’ve always felt inevitable.”Luke finally talks Jonathan into taking a much needed vacation, promising no one will ruin it. Then Evan shows up and ruins it.ft. Jonathan as Dadlirious





	Inevitably

**Author's Note:**

> I love Jonathan as a dad.  
> Also, here are some songs to set the mood. Would recommend giving them a listen:  
> Lauv - I Like Me Better  
> Direct, MrFijiWiji & Holly Drummond - Trust In Me

“For the last time, Luke, I’m not going.” Jonathan said firmly. He was almost ready to dump the plate of pasta he’d made for Luke back into the pot and tell him to fuck off, but Katie was listening to them despite trying to look like she wasn’t. 

Luke was pouting, as he always did when he didn’t get his way. “Jon,” he whined, “nobody even knows I’m going.” 

“That’s a big fat lie because I just talked to Evan two days ago.” Jonathan shoved a plastic fork into Luke’s spaghetti and slid the plate across the island counter to him. “Eat before it gets cold.” He said, taking his own plate over to the table to sit with his daughter.

“Okay, so it was an offhand comment. Just because he knows doesn’t mean he’ll wanna get together or anything. Evan’s a busy dude, I’m sure he’s got more important shit to do.” Luke said around a mouthful. 

“That’s a swear, Uncle Luke.” Katie reminded, also around a mouthful. 

“Sorry, sweet pea.” Luke smiled fondly at her then directed his attention back to Jonathan. “He doesn’t know you’re coming.”

“Because I’m not.” Jonathan said flatly.

Luke had been harassing Jonathan into flying out to California with him for close to a month now, but Jonathan had a daughter, a dog, and a YouTube channel to take care of. He couldn’t afford to take a vacation just to get some sun or whatever it was that Luke kept going on and on about and while a break sounded nice, priorities were priorities. Not to mention the fact that Evan lived out west and didn’t know a damn thing about Jonathan’s personal life and he’d like to keep it that way, thank you very much. He knew, he fucking _knew_ if he so much as crossed the border into California, Evan would find him. Fact of the matter was, Jonathan was terrified of meeting him. None of his friends (aside from Luke) knew about his daughter.

Katie was the best thing that’d ever happened to him and he wasn’t sure he was ready to subject her to his lifestyle. He kept his internet life and personal life separate for a reason, after all. It wasn’t that he wanted to keep secrets or anything, hell, he’d love to show her off to all his friends, but that brought up a whole different issue. He’d never met any of them, never even showed his face. And it wasn’t because he was particularly self-conscious, he didn’t think he was bad looking, just pretty average, yet… As soon as he crossed that line, he knew things would be different. He’d be more real to all his friends, they’d want to hang out with him, meet up with him when they were in town, be closer than Jonathan was really comfortable being with anyone and that scared the absolute piss out of him.

It was complicated above all else and really just too much effort for something Jonathan tried his best not to think about at all. Ever. “You’d love it out there, Jon. The sun is great, food is amazing, and the people are wild. I bet Katie would love if you took her to the beach.” Luke glanced at his niece, whose head perked up at the mention of the beach.

“Can I go swimmin’?” She asked excitedly. 

Jonathan groaned, “Look what you’ve done.” 

Luke shrugged, “You deserve a break, brother. I don’t know what else to tell you. Mom said she was more than willing to watch Zoe for the week. You know she loves that damn dog.”

“You owe me a quarter, Uncle Luke!” Katie said, slapping her hands on the table.

“Your kid is gonna bleed me dry.” Luke complained while fishing in his pocket for change.

“You’re the one who told her about a swear jar, I don’t know what to tell you.” Jonathan rolled his eyes as he got up and took their plates.

Luke handed over however much change he had on him then got up to follow Jonathan while she raced off to dump it in her ever-growing jar. “Is it just because of Evan?” He asked softly.

Jonathan sighed and visibly deflated, “He’s a big part of it, yeah.” He admitted, like Luke didn’t already know. “The last thing I need is to run into him and either lie my ass off, or throw it all out in the open then and there. I wanted this, this _crush_ or whatever to go away before I met him, but I don’t know if it’s going to at this point.” He said dejectedly. Jonathan had always been a little attracted to Evan and plain old attraction was fine, but when feelings got involved and he began daydreaming about his best friend, what it’d be like to have coffee with him in the morning, watch movies late at night, take his daughter, _their_ daughter, to the park, or the beach, or anywhere. That was the worst part, Jonathan figured, the fact that he could picture Evan being a part of his tiny family. He knew Katie would love him like he knew he would love Katie. She was just that kind of tiny, lovable person, or maybe Jonathan was biased, but still. They’d be so good together and he knew it, which was why it was never going to happen.

Luke leaned against the counter while Jonathan began washing dishes, looking like he was contemplating saying something. Jonathan knew he had a lot of opinions and as much as he loathed to admit it, Luke was usually right. “Has it ever occurred to you that maybe he’s got it bad for you too?” The question made Jonathan snort. “I’m serious, Jon. It’s not only me that’s noticed the way he talks to you or about you. The guy has a soft spot at the very least.”

“Well yeah, Evan’s not a hardass. Haven’t you seen his collection of cat shirts and sweaters? It’s ridiculous.” Jonathan smiled to himself when the image cropped up, Evan’s section of closet that was stuffed full of silly shirts with cats on them. He’d sent Jonathan the picture when they’d been on the topic one afternoon. 

“It’s shit like that that you two know about each other. I’ll bet no one else knew he had a stupid cat obsession.” Luke crossed his arms over his chest and held Jonathan’s gaze when it flickered over to him.

“It’s not stupid.” Jonathan grumbled, turning away again. “Where’d Katie go?” He asked. When she was too quiet, he got nervous.

Luke pushed away from the counter to hunt down his niece while Jonathan finished cleaning up dishes and the counter. He found her in her room on the floor, separating the mound of change she had into small piles. “Countin’ your cash, Katie-Bug?” 

“Yeah!” She held up a handful to show Luke, “These are from daddy,” she said then pointed to the rest, “those are yours.”

“For me?” Luke teased, knowing full well what she meant.

“No!” She cried and stood quickly to block Luke’s hand from the change, “You gave me those because you have a dirty mouth.” She scowled at him and Luke did his best not to crack up. 

“Uncle Luke does have a foul mouth, doesn’t he?” Jonathan asked from the doorway, smiling sweetly at his daughter.

“Yeah.” She agreed then sat back down.

Luke stood from his crouched position and joined Jonathan in the hallway, “Listen,” he began, earning an eye roll from Jonathan, “at the very least give it some serious thought. Don’t just blow this off like you usually do. I have the plane tickets and the house rented with enough bedrooms for all of us. Think how excited she’d be, how nice it’d be to get away from everything for a while. Forget about Evan, he’s not in on this equation.”

“You say that, but-”

“But nothing,” Luke cut him off, “I’ll tell him the trip got cancelled if that’s what it takes to drag your ass out there. I don’t care.”

“Luke,” Jonathan sighed, “I just- I,” he paused then closed his eyes. It was senseless to argue about it. “Okay. I’ll think about it.”

Luke clapped him on the shoulder, “That’s all I want, man. You don’t have to decide right now.” Jonathan nodded. “Okay. So, whatever happened to our movie night?” He asked loud enough to grab Katie’s attention.

“Can we watch Moana?!” She asked excitedly as she scrambled to her feet. Jonathan swept her up into his arms when she came running at them and told her they could watch anything she wanted. She was very set on Moana and so they settled in for the night, both Luke and Katie falling asleep halfway through the movie to leave Jonathan watching it for near the twentieth time by himself. 

-

Jonathan, a man of his word, thought about it. And thought about it some more. And considered all the possible outcomes with or without Evan, what he’d say if for whatever reason they did run into him, what they’d do if the name ‘Evan’ never even came up. The scenarios were endless and constantly changing, making Jonathan that much more nervous, but Luke was right. He needed a break and wanted to take Katie to all kinds of places so this would be a start. He called Luke two weeks before they were supposed to go and agreed to tag along.

“Finally!” Luke shouted in his ear, “We’re gonna have such a good time, just you wait and see.”

While Jonathan didn’t doubt that, he was still anxious. He’d never been on a plane before and he knew he was bound to forget something important, but it was settled now. He was going and whether he liked it or not, Luke would make him enjoy himself. 

-

Jonathan had been in airports on several occasions and hated them even more when he was the one being shoved through metal detectors and patted down. By the time they actually made it onto the plane, he felt violated and ready for a bath or a nap, he wasn’t sure which. It didn’t help that he got little to no sleep the previous night. He’d been tossing and turning thinking about Evan, the plane ride, the beach filled with a shit ton of people, Evan, his YouTube channel and his videos, Evan… Finally, he passed out only to wake up to his alarm four hours later. Now, they were tightly packed in uncomfortable seats that didn’t have enough room for his long legs and someone’s child was crying already. He thanked god Katie was a little older now and not so whiney. 

Speaking of Katie, she was antsy in her seat, leaning over Jonathan to look out the window. “How high up do we go, daddy? Can I still watch your phone? When will we be there? How far away is it?” Question after question rolled off her tongue while Jonathan did his best to indulge and answer her. Patience was one of many things having a child taught him early on. 

Luke settled down in the aisle seat, grabbing Katie’s attention when Jonathan’s phone vibrated in his hand. He frowned when he saw Evan’s name on the screen. Not that he wasn’t happy Evan was thinking about him, but it only made him worry he knew something. But the message was just his standard ‘hello’ when they went a few days without talking. He’d fill Jonathan in about what he’d been up to and ask how he’d been. This was no different:

**Evan:**  
_hey man. haven’t seen you online since monday, was wondering where tf you disappeared to now. I’ve been running back and forth from the vet, Macie is sick apparently. my apartment is being torn apart too, mold. landlord isn’t too happy, but that’s not my fault. feel like gmod or smth later? Tyler was talking about a new map he found for guess who. lemme know you’re alive soon pls_

Jonathan thumbed out a quick reply so he could hand his phone over to Katie, who was becoming impatient. 

_sorry. been busy with some shit. I won’t be home for a week or so, running to do and all that. lets make plans after things calm down bc I miss u and need more vids lol._  
_ps. Im alive, are you?_

Once Katie had her cartoons on, Jonathan watched out the window as they flew higher and higher. It wasn’t too bad, but he still grew tense whenever the plane rattled or made an odd noise. Luke fell asleep almost as soon as they were in the air and Jonathan didn’t blame him. He’d been running around like a chicken with his head cut off for days trying to get all their shit packed and ready to go. 

Katie eventually fell asleep too, Jonathan’s phone tucked close to her chest with her cartoons still playing quietly. He tucked a long piece of her dark hair behind her ear then settled down himself, getting comfortable before falling into a restless sleep.

-

California was warm. Jonathan was sweating the second they stepped out into the parking lot carrying both his and Katie’s bags, her hand clutched in his free one so she didn’t run off. She was alert as ever, the nap seemingly energizing her further. “When are we going to the beach, daddy?” She asked excitedly, bouncing along beside Jonathan as he followed Luke toward their rental car. 

“Maybe tomorrow, sweetheart. Daddy and Uncle Luke have a lot of unpacking and things to do at the house.” Jonathan explained, feeling guilty when her dimpled smile faded to a more subdued expression. She still wore a small smile as she nodded in understanding, head swiveling around to look at the change of scenery. 

“Toss your stuff here.” Luke said when they reached the jeep. Jonathan helped him shove their suitcases and duffle bags into the back then got Katie strapped in her seat before they were on the road, the top ripped off and wind blowing through their hair.

Jonathan was already enjoying the sun and knew by the time they left he’d have a nice tan to start the summer with. He’d have to remember sunscreen for Katie when they went to the beach, the girl inherited her mother’s pale skin and burned easily. 

“See, not so bad?” Luke grinned over at him.

Jonathan rolled his eyes, but agreed, “You’ve got me out here, now what?”

“Now, we sightsee and swim and _relax_ for once.” Luke said, but Jonathan ignored the jab. There was no time to relax with a child, for one thing, but Luke knew that. Jonathan figured he meant get away from the internet, YouTube more specifically.

The hour drive took longer than expected with traffic, but Jonathan wasn’t bothered. It gave him more time to take in the sights and try to get used to the change of pace. He was so used to small town life that this felt like a breath of fresh air. 

“This is the same place I usually rent out if it’s available. It’s got a killer shower and a yard for Katie-Bug.” Luke said with a wink in the rearview. They pulled into the driveway of a pretty grey house situated in a decent sized neighborhood. The large fences gave them privacy, however close the houses were to each other and the trees in the back cast a good deal of shade. Katie immediately spotted the tire swing and begged Jonathan to push her. 

“After you unpack, okay?” Jonathan promised then watched her chase after Luke with her purple backpack over one shoulder and her stuffed penguin tucked under her arm. Jonathan grabbed the rest of the bags and closed the trunk then followed after them, listening to Katie tell Luke which room was going to be hers. 

Jonathan dropped his things in his room then followed his daughter’s voice to find her throwing clothes and toys out of her bags. Luke had mysteriously disappeared. “Katie, you’re making a mess.” Jonathan sighed.

“I’m unpacking!” She argued, throwing Max the penguin onto the bed. “Can we swing now?” She asked, turning her puppy dog eyes on him. 

“Alright.” Jonathan caved, “But you’re cleaning this up before bed. Understand?” Katie nodded enthusiastically then skipped back into the hallway and to the kitchen where Luke was on the phone. He patted her head as she passed and made for the back door. “We’re going to swing.” Jonathan told him quietly.

Luke held the phone away from his mouth as he spoke, “I’m ordering food since there’s nothing here. We’ll go shopping tomorrow, yeah?” Jonathan nodded then chased after his daughter. 

-

By seven o’clock, they’d swung to their hearts content and had full bellies as they stretched out on the couch to watch a movie before bed. Katie snuggled up to Jonathan’s side while Jonathan thumbed through his texts and notifications.

Evan had sent him a slew of messages, mostly memes and new music, but one was him telling Jonathan to hurry so they could play something together. Evan always got antsy when they went too long without skyping or gaming. It made Jonathan’s chest ache in that funny way. 

“Doesn’t a small part of you want to see him?” Luke asked quietly as not to wake Katie up. 

Jonathan didn’t bother asking how he knew because Luke always knew. “No.” He lied. 

Luke rolled his eyes, “He’s the exact same in person. That funny oddball. Maybe he’s a bit more awkward, but he gets over it the more time you spend with him. He’s sweet, Jon, and I know he’s dying to see you.”

“I don’t care.” Jonathan said, “He knows how I feel about it, we’ve had this same conversation and he respects my privacy.”

“I’m not saying he doesn’t. I’m just saying, how long are you going to make him wait?” Luke wondered. Jonathan didn’t have an answer for that so he chewed on his lip before he scooped Katie up to put her to bed.

Luke didn’t follow him, thankfully and once Katie was tucked in, Jonathan retired to his room for the night. He knew Luke had the best of intentions, but he didn’t need the constant shoving in all the wrong directions. He didn’t care what Luke thought, or how badly Evan wanted to meet him. It could and would wait until the timing was right. 

Jonathan cracked his door in case Katie needed anything then changed into PJ’s before crawling beneath the sheets. The air was cranking, but it was still warm so it took him a while to fall asleep. When he finally did, he dreamt of Evan.

-

For once, Luke hadn’t meddled and yet he knew he was going to be blamed for this. It was eight in the morning and he was in the process of making cereal for Katie while adding to an ever-growing list of things to get from the grocery store when someone knocked on the door. To his immense horror, Evan stood on the porch, all smiles this morning. “Evan?” Luke asked, voice strained.

“Hey,” Evan greeted, rocking back on his heels, “hoped you’d be up. I saw you get in yesterday, but didn’t wanna interrupt your unpacking or anything. You never told me you were flying out for sure.”

Luke scrambled for an excuse, “Well, it was sort of last minute. I finally talked someone into coming with and so things kind of… took a little longer. What are you doing out here anyway?” He asked in a rush, hoping to god Jonathan would stay asleep for a little while longer. 

“My apartment is being torn apart, drywall needs to come out and a bit of the floor too. Mold, lots of it. Like I don’t know how Scott let it get so bad, but it’s why I’ve been feeling like shit lately. So, I rented a place out this way in case you did end up coming for the week so we could catch up.”

Evan was so earnest, Luke had a hard time being upset. “Ah,” he said intelligently, “that’s great. I’ve been meaning to introduce you to J-James.” He hurriedly corrected himself, crossing his fingers Evan would write the stutter off as an early morning slip up. “Friend of mine from way back when.” He explained.

“Uncle Luke, who’s here?” Katie asked as she pushed her way between the doorframe and Luke.

Evan glanced down at the little girl, a smile tugging at his lips. “Hello, sweetie. I’m Evan, a friend of your uncle’s.” He introduced himself. 

Katie looked him up and down then turned to Luke, “Is he daddy’s friend too?” She asked curiously.

Luke coughed, “This is Katie, James’s daughter.” He could tell Katie was about to correct him on her father’s name, but Luke steered her back into the house. “Did you finish your breakfast?” She smiled sheepishly then disappeared back toward the kitchen. “Were you wanting to come in?” Luke asked, hoping Evan would say no, but Evan smiled and nodded.

“She’s adorable. Ever thought about having kids of your own?” Evan asked as he followed Luke inside. 

“Nah,” Luke shook his head, “she’s more than enough for me. At least with this one I can give her back whenever I want.” He joked. 

Katie had dragged Max the penguin to breakfast with her and sat talking to him while she shoved spoonfuls of soggy cereal into her mouth. 

Evan made himself comfortable, hopping up onto the counter while he chitchatted with Luke. His eyes kept drifting back over to the girl, Katie. He had a feeling, a very prominent feeling, that he was in fact friends with her father and his suspicions were confirmed when a disheveled looking man wandered into the kitchen. 

Jonathan yawned and shoved his hair back from his forehead as he walked into the kitchen. Katie’s bed had been empty, so he figured he’d find her complaining about being hungry in the kitchen, but what he found instead was a very familiar face. He stopped dead as soon as his feet touched the tile and only just managed not to ask Luke _what the fuck was going on_. 

“James!” Luke greeted, apparently talking to Jonathan. He quickly caught on. Luke was covering for him. Luke hadn’t planned this. 

Jonathan nodded, “Morning.” 

Evan stared unabashedly at _James_ who he was very sure was Jonathan, but whatever charade they were trying so hard to maintain was too good to be ruined, so Evan went along with it. “Hi, sorry for the intrusion.”

“It’s Uncle Luke’s friend, daddy.” Katie supplied helpfully. 

“Where’d you get cereal from?” Jonathan asked her, temporarily distracted.

“I snagged a few boxes from the corner store to hold us over until we go shopping.” Luke said, visibly relaxing when he realized Jonathan wasn’t going to explode. 

“Thanks.” Jonathan grabbed a bowl for himself and sat beside his daughter, too aware of Evan’s lingering gaze. He wiped at her mouth with a napkin and nodded while she told him about Max’s latest adventures. 

“Were you guys planning on hitting the beach at all while you’re here?” Evan asked Luke, but Katie heard and immediately perked up. 

“The beach! Daddy, you said we could go swimmin’.” She reminded.

Jonathan took her bowl to deposit in the sink then worked her long hair back from her face, twisting it into a bun on the top of her head. “I did say that, but I also said you would clean your room before bed and you didn’t. So, if you clean up your mess, we’ll go to the beach. How’s that?” He asked her as he tied her hair up. She winced, but nodded then took off running when Jonathan let her go. “That answers that.” Jonathan said, looking from Evan to Luke.

“Would you be opposed to me tagging along?” Evan asked, gaze never wavering from Jonathan. Luke got the feeling he wasn’t the one being asked for permission and so left that up to Jonathan. He really didn’t know where to go from here, but felt it smart to watch from a safe distance. 

“Don’t matter.” Jonathan shrugged. He wanted to say no, but supposedly he and Evan didn’t know each other and so he couldn’t be rude to Luke’s friend. “We have extra room if you wanna grab your things and meet back here. We’ll probably head out early to avoid too big of a rush.”

Evan hopped down from the counter and told them he’d be back in twenty then left. Jonathan immediately panicked. “What the _fuck_ , Luke?!” He asked, raking his hands through his hair.

“Jon, I swear I had no idea he’d show up. I never even told him I was flying out here for sure. His apartment is being gutted apparently, so he’s renting a place round here.” Luke hurried to explain, hands splayed in desperation.

“So he shows up _here_?! You’re telling me you didn’t plan this?” Jonathan began to pace, but tried to keep a level head to avoid upsetting Katie. “Luke, I don’t know if I can do this. What if he knows?”

Luke grabbed Jonathan by the shoulders, “He doesn’t know and he’s not gonna. Why’d you think I lied my ass off? I told you we were going to have a good week. _Please_ don’t let this ruin it. We can just go with this halfassed story for now and if you get around to telling him, great, if not,” he shrugged, “no harm no foul.”

“I’m supposed to lie to him and pretend I know nothing about him.” Jonathan said flatly, “I don’t know if I can keep the act up.” He admitted.

“You don’t have to, but if you want to avoid the inevitable for a little while longer, roll with what we’ve got.” Luke shook him gently, “You’ve met him already, though. That’s the first step, yeah?”

“Sure.” Jonathan felt faint. Katie bound back into the kitchen, swimsuit on and twisted. “Come here, honey.” He straightened it for her then listened to her chatter excitedly while he shoved the necessities into a bag. His stomach was twisted into tight knots. He was going to the beach with Evan. Evan knew what he looked like, but not who he was. He met Evan finally, but Evan didn’t know it was him.

-

Evan erased the message he’d been typing out for the third time. Part of him wanted to get under Jonathan’s skin and see how long it’d take for him to realize that he knew, but another part of him wasn’t actually sure at all no matter what his gut was telling him. Between Luke’s slip up and _James’s_ look of horror as he walked into the kitchen, there was little room for doubt, but the last thing Evan wanted was to be wrong. He settled on a short reply and a photo of Macie with her sad cone around her neck that made her look like a lamp. 

He changed into his swimming shorts and threw on a light tank top before stuffing a towel and some bottles of water into a bag. He needed to watch himself when talking to _James_ because for whatever reason, Jonathan didn’t want him knowing it was him. If he had to guess, Evan supposed maybe a part of it was his child. He’d admit that it caught him off guard, but she looked practically the spitting image of him; dark curly hair, long eyelashes, soft accent. The only subtle differences were the skin tones and eye colors. Jonathan was tanner and his eyes were a pretty, pale blue while she was pale and her eyes were coffee brown. 

The more Evan thought about it, the more he could totally see Jonathan being a father and a great one at that. It gave him a whole new perspective, but it was just as appealing as all the other things about him. Jonathan was beautiful, plain and simple. Evan fell in love with his soul ages ago and that wasn’t going to change easily or anytime soon. 

Evan drove back over to Luke’s and slung his bag over his shoulder as he joined the three of them by a dark green jeep. “Sunscreen?” Luke asked, apparently double checking they had everything before they loaded up and set off.

“Yep and she’s already covered in the stuff. Towels for all of us, water. There’s a few chairs in the back already. Katie’s lifejacket. We can get food out.” Jonathan ticked off things on his fingers.

“Think we’re good to go then.” Luke said, grinning brightly at them. “Evan, welcome back.” He said, snapping Jonathan’s attention away from his bag. Katie was swinging a bucket around in circles, singing happily about going to the beach. 

“Let’s grab a place then before the rush.” Evan suggested, helping where he could with the bags and an inflatable Luke insisted on bringing. 

Evan sat in back beside Katie, who talked his ear off and asked a million questions. He was instantly taken by her and Jonathan noticed. The drive wasn’t too long, but the sun was climbing higher and it was getting warmer so the sight of the beach was a welcomed relief. 

They parked and collected their things from the jeep. “Come here, Katie-Bug. I want this on you if you’re going to swim.” Jonathan buckled her into her lifejacket then let her run off to catch up with Luke who was scouting out a spot for them to set up their chairs and towels. “Thank fuck Luke remembered an umbrella.” Jonathan muttered.

“Forget anything else?” Evan asked, tone teasing. 

“No, think we’re good.” Jonathan handed Evan two chairs to carry while he grabbed the rest of their things and headed down the beach. The sand was hot between his toes, but Jonathan couldn’t be bothered. Evan was walking beside him looking too pleased with himself and far more attractive than he had any right to be. It was a struggle to keep his eyes off him.

“Over here!” Luke called, catching their attention. Jonathan left the set up to Luke and Evan to chase after Katie. She splashed eagerly into the water and laughed when Jonathan slipped on wet sand, nearly falling. 

Jonathan sat in the shallow water while his daughter ran from waves and continuously poured buckets of water over his head. Eventually, she sat further up the shore in the sand to start building sand castles, making Jonathan fetch the water. Evan and Luke joined them after setting up the umbrella and chairs, Luke with his inflatable and Evan without a shirt. Jonathan quickly averted his gaze and focused on the crumbling sand that Katie was fighting to mold to the right shape. 

Evan sat on the opposite side of the castle Katie and Jonathan were working on, a million questions racing through his mind. He was too eager for his own good and if he wasn’t careful, he’d royally fuck everything up. Jonathan had a daughter, but last he knew, he was single. He wondered where her mother was and if Jonathan still seen her. “Hey, Katie,” Evan shuffled closer to help with the castle, “how old are you?”

“Four.” Katie said proudly, holding up four sandy fingers. Evan glanced at Jonathan, who was smiling at his daughter. His cheeks flushed when he caught Evan staring. 

“How do you and Luke know each other?” Evan asked, as if he didn’t already know. Well, he needed to pretend and he wanted Jonathan to relax a little.

Jonathan pursed his lips, thinking. “School.” He said, deciding the truth couldn’t hurt. Luke was still friends with a lot of people he went to school with. While it wasn’t the _whole_ truth, it was good enough.

Evan didn’t particularly like this closed off version of Jonathan, but he could tell he was uncomfortable and anxious, so he was wary to press further. He wanted him to feel comfortable and be able to talk openly like they always did during their gaming sessions, or when they’d sit in near silence while editing. “Have you ever been to California before?” He asked, hoping casual small talk would loosen him up.

“No, I’ve never even been on a plane until now.” Jonathan said, laughing almost hysterically. “This is a huge change.”

“I bet.” Evan agreed. He worked on his half of the moat around their castle while trying not to ogle at Jonathan, but it was hard. The sun made his eyes clearer, the wind ruffled his hair attractively, and he smiled fondly at his daughter. Evan’s heart gave a pitiful thump in his chest. 

“You losers gettin’ in the water sometime today?” Luke called from his stupid floaty, sunglasses obscuring his eyes, but his wide grin visible even at a distance. 

“It is getting warm.” Evan said, brushing the sand off his legs as he stood.

“Go on ahead. We’ll finish this then be out there. Right, Katie-Bug?” Jonathan flicked water at his daughter, chuckling when she tried to do it back.

Evan bit his lip then hurried toward the water. He waded out to meet Luke where the water was waist deep, the temperature comfortable if not a little warm. “He’s somethin’, eh?” Luke said, raising a brow.

“What? Oh, yeah.” Evan looked away shyly. 

“You wanna be honest with me?” Luke offered. Evan wasn’t hard to read, not since he’d spent so much time with him and learned his mannerisms. 

Evan ran a wet hand through his hair, smoothing it back and away from his face, “Not really.” He admitted.

Luke waited, but it appeared that was all he was going to get. “You know, don’t you? I fucked up this morning and you knew right away. I can tell by the way you look at him.”

“How do I look at him?” Evan asked, face feeling hot.

“Like you never wanna stop.” Luke mused, feeling smug.

Evan caught his bottom lip between his teeth again, “That obvious?”

“Little bit, but if it’s any consolation, our boy hasn’t noticed.” Luke slipped off his floaty and into the water, diving under to wet his hair before tucking the inflatable under his arms, floating lazily.

“Why doesn’t he want me to know it’s him?” Evan asked, “Does he not trust me? Is it Katie?” They seemed so close online. Evan thought he knew everything, but it was apparent that wasn’t the case.

Luke hummed thoughtfully, wondering how much to tell him and how much to let Jonathan get around to telling him himself. “Jon is wary for a few reasons. You can’t take it personally, he’s like this with everyone and more so since he’s had Katie. I think it’s even worse with you because you’re such a big part of his life. He’s always worried he’s going to fuck something up, like he’s waiting for an inevitable disaster, but he’s the disaster and you’re just inevitable.”

“I always thought we were close.” Evan said, feeling a bit disappointed despite himself. 

Luke clicked his tongue, “Y’all are close. How many people know you have a whole section of your closet dedicated to clothes with cats on em?” Evan laughed then shrugged. “How many people you think know he’s got a kid?” Evan waited, eventually shrugging again, “Me, her mother, and our families. That’s it. Now you, Ev. He didn’t run, which already speaks volumes. You both need to reevaluate your relationship and figure your shit out.”

Evan sighed, “It’s on his terms. I don’t want to push him in the wrong direction.”

“Sometimes he needs a little push.” Luke said. He looked up to find Jonathan watching them and knew he’d be in for it later.

-

Even with an overabundance of sunscreen, Katie still managed to get a little pink in the face. Her cheeks were warm and she was complaining about her shoulders hurting, but she eventually fell asleep while Jonathan read to her. Jonathan sat for a while just watching her breathe deeply as he replayed the day in his head. Evan had been great, if not a bit invasive, but he figured it only seemed like that because he was so closed off and standoffish. It didn’t seem to deter Evan, which made Jonathan want to shove him away a little harder, but at the same time pull him as close as possible. 

Katie liked him, kept talking about him and how good his side of the sand castle was. She colored with him when they went out for dinner, which was a fast way to her heart then later she asked if he could watch movies with them and Jonathan hadn’t been able to tell her no, so they all sat squashed on the couch watching Beauty and the Beast. Luke had disappeared in the middle of it, leaving Jonathan alone with Evan and Katie, who had fallen asleep. Luckily, they were both focused on the movie, or Jonathan pretended to be, so it left little room for conversation until they said their farewells and Evan let himself out. 

Jonathan didn’t know whether he wanted to cave and tell Evan exactly who he was so the awkward air between them would vanish, or if he wanted to book the soonest flight home and forget any of it ever happened at all. He was torn because Evan was so much better in person and just like he fucking knew, he fit in so well with his little family. Regardless, the rest of the week would be hell because Evan was undoubtedly going to be hanging around. He trudged off to bed, finally checking his phone when he was under the sheets to see Evan had text him earlier before they went to the beach then more recently.

**Evan:**  
_Macie is temporarily a lamp._  
_why’d u go and tell Luke about my kitty collection btw? I trusted u._

That must have been what the two of them were talking about while they were out in the water. Jonathan really hoped Luke could keep his fat mouth shut until he was good and ready or else there was bound to be some mess to resolve by the time they were due to head home. 

-

The next morning Jonathan woke before Luke and Katie. They’d never gotten around to grocery shopping the previous day, so he settled for a bowl of cereal again. His head was throbbing dully from lack of caffeine, but he ignored it as he ate slowly. He spotted Luke’s list on the table and dragged it closer to get a good look at it. He added a few things and was in the process of rinsing his bowl when Luke walked in, disheveled and still half asleep. “We need coffee soon.” He said, plopping down where Jonathan had been sitting.

“After we’re dressed and moving we can run to the store. Don’t have anything else going on.” Jonathan said. He grabbed a bowl for Luke and another one for Katie because she was due to be up any time now. “Can you keep an ear out for Katie? I’m going to take a quick shower.” Luke waved him off so Jonathan hurried to collect a change of clothes and showered mechanically. 

By the time he got out, he could hear Katie talking animatedly and what sounded like Evan’s familiar voice. Was he really over so early? Jonathan dressed slowly, worrying his fingers through his damp hair as he tried to talk himself into leaving the bathroom. He scowled at himself in the mirror and sucked in a deep breath before throwing the door open and heading back toward the kitchen. 

Sure enough, Evan was sat at the table with Katie, a quarter spinning on his finger. Jonathan watched him hide it then pretend to pull it from her ear. She was beyond excited and dragged Jonathan over so Evan could show him too. 

Jonathan fought the blush that was creeping up his neck when Evan leaned closer and his fingers brushed his ear. He smiled as he held up the quarter. Jonathan didn’t indulge him for long. They needed to seriously get their shopping done or they’d be living off of take out and cereal for the rest of the week. 

“Let’s get you dressed, short stack.” Jonathan said, running his fingers through Katie’s tangled mess of hair. “You need a bath, actually.”

“That _hurts_ , daddy!” Katie complained, shying away from Jonathan’s hands. Jonathan clicked his tongue and picked her up from the chair. “Don’t leave Max!” She complained, grabbing for her penguin. Evan handed it to him then Jonathan disappeared to the bathroom with his daughter, leaving Evan feeling out of place in the kitchen with Luke.

“You’re both pathetic, you know that?” Luke sighed. 

“What?” Evan asked, slipping the quarter back into his pocket. “I don’t know what to say to him without fucking up.” He said quietly, worried Jonathan would hear them. 

Luke moved around the island counter to sit beside Evan, “Just be yourself, Ev. He’ll open up quicker if you don’t try so hard. He knows it’s you and thinks you have no idea who he is, so he’s terrified. I think he’ll come around, but I just don’t know when. He’s been on the fence about you for a long time.”

Evan knew the feeling, but he also knew where he stood now. Jonathan was his best friend and over the course of their five year online friendship, it’d developed into something more. For Evan anyway. He always hoped his feelings weren’t one-sided, but he never expected anything to come of it. The way Luke was making it sound, though…

“Anyway,” Luke changed the subject, informing Evan they needed to get some running done, but that he was more than welcome over later in the evening when things calmed down. He said he wanted to take Jonathan a few places, show him the sights and big city life. “He’s not much of a partier, but he likes good music and good food.” Luke told him with a wink. Evan saved that tidbit of information for later.

Fifteen minutes later, Jonathan followed Katie back into the kitchen, looking a bit wetter. “We seriously need to get coffee.” He said, eyeing his daughter’s carefree smile. 

“I’m going to head out.” Evan said, figuring it was better to take his leave sooner rather than later. 

“See you round, Ev.” Luke said.

“Later.” Jonathan gave a small wave, preoccupied with Katie’s hair. 

After Evan left, Luke scrubbed a hand over his face. “This is going to be the longest three days of my life.” He complained. Jonathan ignored him.

They eventually got ready and loaded up in the jeep to head out to the nearest grocery store. Katie refused to stay sitting in the cart, so Jonathan left cart pushing duties up to Luke while he plucked things off the shelves and crossed them off their list. 

Luke hadn’t been lying when he said the people were wild. Or at the very least different. He almost felt more at home here than back in North Carolina. His small town’s people were stuck in their ways and Jonathan remembered the dirty looks he got when he came home with his first tattoo. Nobody looked twice at him here and he liked that. 

Shopping took longer than probably necessary only because Katie wanted all the snacks she could get her hands on and Jonathan had a hard time telling her no. Their cart was nearly overflowing by the time they made it to the checkout. At least the fridge and cupboards would be full, he figured. 

On the way back to the house, Jonathan checked his phone to see Evan’s name on his screen once again. 

**Evan:**  
_Tyler’s been harassing me bc youve been mia. told him u were just busy with real life stuff. told me to tell u to hurry ur ass up, but also he hopes all is well. I met someone who reminds me of you._

Jonathan’s breath stuck in his chest. _Fuck_. Was he talking about him? He had to be, right? How many other people was Evan randomly meeting? His hands shook with anxiety, but he swallowed down the panic and typed out a quick reply before stuffing his phone back into his pocket. 

_tell him to fuck off. I’ll be back when I get back. tell him thnks too, or I will ig. bet im still cooler._

-

Luke was making coffee as soon as they got all the groceries put away and Jonathan was not complaining. Katie was hyper, running through the house, flapping Max’s sad wings. Jonathan didn’t bother to remind her that penguins couldn’t fly. “Think we need to get out or something.” Jonathan said.

“There’s an aquarium not too far from here, like nothing back at home. Katie would love it and so would you.” Luke was already grabbing the keys again.

“Where’re we goin’?” Katie asked, running back into the kitchen. 

“Wanna see some fishies?” Jonathan asked her. She nodded enthusiastically.

“Is Evan coming? Does Evan like fishies, too?” She asked.

Jonathan fought the urge to bang his head against the wall. “I don’t know, sweetie. We can ask him.”

“Okay!” She agreed. 

“Put your socks back on please.” Jonathan called after her, turning to Luke to see him with his phone in his hand already. “I can do without your commentary throughout the day, thanks.”

Luke feigned innocence, “What, me? I haven’t said a thing.”

“Good. Let’s keep it that way.” Jonathan’s smile was dangerous. Luke knew he was bordering something like a mental breakdown, but it really wasn’t that bad. He’d come to terms eventually. Hopefully, anyway.

Jonathan packed a small bag with the necessities having a child warranted then waited impatiently for Evan to join them again. He really couldn’t lie and say he didn’t enjoy his company, he did. It was just hard to pretend he didn’t know anything. Forcing small talk wasn’t something he was good at and he had nothing interesting to talk about. He nearly caught himself asking Evan about the latest session they had and his video, but he bit his tongue. It was easy to fall back into comfortable routine with him, so each time they spent a few more hours together, Jonathan was finding it harder and harder to keep a safe distance.

Katie was ecstatic to see the fish. Jonathan knew this would pitch her back into her Nemo obsession, but it was one of his favorite movies, so he didn’t really mind. Evan sat beside her in the backseat again and kept her attention, listening raptly as she talked about her favorite colorful fishies and eventually about Nemo and Finding Dory. Jonathan liked ( _loved_ ) how Evan was with her. He didn’t treat her like a child, or brush her off. She was practically a mini adult and she loved the attention Evan showered her with. 

It was easily a fast way to Jonathan’s heart, as if Evan needed any more reason to be fucking perfect. 

The aquarium, much to Jonathan’s dismay, was fairly busy. Most of the people were preoccupied with their own families and the grand displays to be paying anyone else any mind, but Jonathan still got antsy in large crowds. He hoisted Katie up and held her on his hip as they finally got through the ticket line and into the actual aquarium. It was pretty, as all aquariums were in Jonathan’s opinion, and his anxiety faded into the glowing blue-green of the tanks as they approached. Katie squirmed in his arms, wanting down to press her nose to the glass. Jonathan hovered over her, vaguely aware of Evan standing a bit too close to him.

Luke was looking around for directions to the sharks while the three of them watched several stingrays float by lazily. 

Evan fidgeted restlessly, trying his best to avoid staring at Jonathan for more than seven seconds. He counted, thirty second intervals before he glanced back over at him, his face tinged with the blue hue and his eyes glittering. Evan hated himself in that moment because it was so painfully obvious how well and truly fucked he was. He knew Jonathan was bound to be pretty, but this was just ridiculous. His blue eyes flickered to the left, at Evan for the first time and Evan blinked hard to clear his thoughts before looking away. He could feel the heat creeping up into his face and could only hope that the lighting in the aquarium would hide it. 

Jonathan snapped to attention when Katie bolted for the next section, the display containing all her favorites from Nemo, which she continued to point out loudly. Evan followed a bit slower, feeling fuzzy with emotions and heavy with something bittersweet that made his heart ache in an addicting sort of way. He figured he probably should have known from the beginning that this would be a bad idea. Not just the aquarium and its lighting, but just… Jonathan. Even when they were on opposite ends of the country, Evan could feel the pull that constantly dragged him right back. It was probably like an addiction, but maybe a little healthier. Or not, considering the way his stomach twisted and his chest grew tight. 

Children weren’t something Evan ever gave much thought, but Katie was precious and the way Jonathan bent over backwards for her made Evan weak. He wanted what they had, or wanted to be a part of it, which was a startling revelation. He wanted a family, but not with just anyone. It had to be Jonathan. It had to be his best friend and his beautiful daughter that was now tugging on his hand, staring up at him with big brown eyes.

“Uncle Luke found the sharks.” She told Evan with a smile that showed all her teeth and the dimples she inherited from Jonathan. 

“What are we waiting for?” Evan asked, winking at her as she jumped up and down excitedly. “Lead the way.” He said and so she took off, following Luke who was walking backward to keep an eye on her. Jonathan jogged to keep up, throwing a backwards glance and a heart stopping smile at Evan over his shoulder. Evan fought down a groan as he trailed after them.

-

They spent well over two hours wandering around and getting a chance to see behind the scenes, which Evan secretly loved. He made it a point to avoid Luke’s eyes because the man had zeroed in on him an hour into their stay with that knowing look and Evan was just waiting for him to say something. But he didn’t, he kept his mouth shut and continued shooting looks at both of them, though Jonathan was apparently oblivious. 

Katie was quiet on the way home, tired out from all the excitement. Evan watched out the window, feeling oddly melancholy and wondering what the fuck he should do next. He needed time to think and really consider where this would go, best case scenario. Jonathan would be honest with him and Evan would be honest in return, spilling his guts and all his overflowing feelings until Jonathan either ran away or kissed him. It was pretty fifty-fifty, or so Evan thought.

On the other hand, the week could end as it started with Jonathan lying about who he was and Evan pretending not to know any different. It _could_ , but he really didn’t want it to. He wanted Jonathan to know that he knew from the very beginning, that he didn’t care what the reason was for lying about it, or that he had a daughter, or that it took him five fucking years because he didn’t care. He was here and he was the same person albeit a little more reserved, but Evan didn’t blame him. 

Evan thanked them for letting him tag along when they were back at the rental house and Jonathan smiled sweetly at him before heading inside with his daughter, leaving Evan alone with Luke. “What’re you doin’ tomorrow?” He asked instead of anything else Evan knew he was thinking about.

“Probably running some errands. I’ve got a lot on my mind.” Evan said honestly. There was no point in lying to Luke when the man could read his every emotion plain as day on his face. 

Luke nodded, “That’ll be good. Think we’re probably just going to hang around the house tomorrow, maybe shoot out to the beach if we get a bug up our asses. Jonathan needs some air too, I think. I can see the wheels turning in his head.”

“Alright. I’ll see you later then.” Evan fished his keys from his pocket and waved over his shoulder as he got into his car. He rested his forehead against the steering wheel and sighed. “Fuck.” He complained to the empty passenger seat, “Fuck.”

-

The house was already nearly spotless, the place kept immaculate, but Jonathan was restless and so flitted around from the kitchen to the living room to Katie’s room, which was constantly returning to its disastrous state, cleaning for lack of something to do with his hands. Luke watched him, figuring it better to let him stew on it for a while. He didn’t know what was going on in that head of his, but knew it’d eventually burst out of him when he couldn’t take it anymore.

Jonathan had felt Evan’s eyes on him the _entire time_ they were at the aquarium. It made him self-conscious and uncomfortable, but he couldn’t very well ask Evan to _stop_ so he pretended not to notice and wondered _what the fuck_ he was looking at. Evan had been quiet, looking lost in thought when he wasn’t staring at Jonathan, his eyes and face lit beautifully by the lights. Jonathan’s heart thumped painfully and he knew that the crush he was straining to kick was only growing into something more dangerous, something inevitable much as he hated to admit it. 

Eventually, he had nothing left to clean and he was wiped out after the long day so he collapsed beside Luke on the couch, sighing deeply. Luke looked over at him, one eyebrow raised in question, but Jonathan shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about it. He wanted to let it eat him alive instead. He stared at the TV, not paying any attention to what was actually on. 

The night dragged until Katie was asleep beside him on the couch and Jonathan was fighting to keep his eyes open. His phone was unusually quiet and he couldn’t help but wonder what was going through Evan’s head.

Jonathan tucked Katie into bed then flopped into his own unmade bed, not bothering to change out of his jeans. He rolled over and buried his head beneath his pillow before falling into a dreamless sleep.

-

The next day was no better. Jonathan’s thoughts were still a muddled mess whirling erratically while he tried his best to relax. They spent a big portion of the day outside in the backyard, hooking up a sprinkler and pushing Katie on the tire swing. Luke kept shooting sideways glances at Jonathan when he thought he wasn’t looking, but Jonathan could feel his curious eyes. He knew he was dying to ask him what was going on in his head, but he’d explode sooner or later like he always did. It’d probably happen tonight. He’d spill all his fears and worry excessively until Luke talked some sense into him and eventually forced him into doing what he should have done in the very beginning. 

Jonathan was making lunch when his phone chimed from the counter. He wiped his hands on a towel before grabbing it, checking to see it was Evan yet again.

**Evan:**  
_miss u_

The two little words made guilt roll in Jonathan’s gut, but he was also wearing a stupid fucking smile because _Evan missed him_. He sent back an equally short reply, telling Evan he missed him too then hurried to finish making Katie her lunch so he could eat as well. 

Afternoon melted into evening and Katie sat on the floor at the coffee table coloring while Jonathan and Luke watched Brave. “Heard from Evan?” Luke asked a little too casually. 

“Yeah.” Jonathan said and left it at that. Luke waited, but Jonathan kept his eyes fixed on the TV.

“And?” He prompted. 

“And nothing. He said he missed me.” Jonathan rolled his eyes at the “aww” that followed.

“I can ask him to come over.” Luke offered.

“No thank you.” 

Luke frowned, but dropped it. One way or another, the issue would resolve itself. 

Once Katie was in bed, Jonathan returned to the living room to find Luke sat waiting, looking pointedly at him when he walked in. “Okay,” he said, “I’ve let you think long and hard all day, now tell me what’s goin’ on.” 

Jonathan sighed as he collapsed onto the couch, “I need to tell him.” He said, which Luke already knew. He bit his tongue to keep from saying that Evan already knew because Jonathan wouldn’t be too happy about that. “I don’t think it’s a crush anymore.” Jonathan said quietly.

Luke could have told him that much. “No, safe to say it’s not.” He agreed. “I don’t think that’s a bad thing though.”

“You have no idea what goes through his head.” Jonathan argued. 

“Oh, I think I have some clue. Just because you’re oblivious as fuck doesn’t mean we all are.” Luke laughed.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jonathan demanded.

Luke wanted to tell him how Evan looked at him. It was the same way he looked at Evan and he knew how he felt about him, but he just shook his head. “I think you just need to talk to him.”

Jonathan snorted, “Right. Sit down over dinner and spill the beans.” Luke rolled his eyes. “We’re leaving Saturday night. I have tomorrow to figure out what the fuck to say and that’s not enough time.”

“There’s a place I want him to take you.” Luke said, recalling the pier he and Evan visited on multiple occasions. “It’s out by the water and has a really nice view. I’ll tell him to take you tomorrow. I’ll keep an eye on Katie.”

“What?!” Jonathan sputtered, “You’re going to make it sound like a, like a _date_.”

Luke shrugged, “So? I’ll bet you he agrees.”

“Only because he’s polite!” Jonathan argued, scowling at Luke.

“Just go with it, please. I swear this will work out, Jon. You two are made for each other.”

Jonathan stopped bothering to argue with him. Once Luke set his mind to something, there wasn’t much anyone could do to stop him. The hard part now was figuring out how to go about explaining to Evan that he _lied_ and also has a daughter. No big deal. 

Luke had his phone in his hands seconds after Jonathan went to bed, fingers flying over the screen as he typed out a message to Evan:

_u and jon are goin to the pier tomorrow. the one u like. u need to talk about some shit and hopefully he doesn’t get pissed off when he finds out u knew the whole time lol. I’ll be watching Katie, so don’t worry about that. when u get back I better see u two shits holding hands or smth_

-

Evan tugged nervously at his overgrown hair. He’d been letting it grow out, but now he was worried it looked stupid. Not that it mattered, Jonathan already knew what it looked like. He debated on putting shorts on instead of jeans, but he liked these jeans and knew it wouldn’t be as hot out by the water. The tank top he wore was one of his favorites, well-worn and comfortable. He wondered idly what Jonathan was going to wear then quickly shook his head to rid the thought. 

Luke hadn’t really given him much choice in the matter when he’d said he and Jonathan were going to the pier and it sounded like Jonathan wasn’t exactly overexcited about it either, but Evan decided it’d be better to go with it. He didn’t want to watch them go on Saturday and not set things right between them. Plus, now would be good a time as ever to tell Jon how he really felt. 

At noon, Evan was pacing a hole in the floor when his phone vibrated in his pocket. Luke had texted him telling him to drag his ass on over so they could get a move on. “Now or never.” Evan muttered, grabbed his keys, and then headed outside. 

“Do I look okay?” Jonathan asked for the third time. 

“What the fuck are you worried about? He already knows what you look like.” Luke said, rolling his eyes.

“Not really.” Jonathan argued, voice pitched high. “He doesn’t know it’s _me_.”

_He does,_ Luke wanted to say, and he doesn’t give a damn. “Doesn’t matter what you look like, but you look fine. Hey, he’s here.”

“Fuck.” Jonathan breathed, stuffing his trembling hands into his pockets.

“Daddy!” Katie reprimanded. 

“Sorry, sweetie.” Jonathan bent to hug her and kiss her head. “I’ll be back soon, okay? Be good for Uncle Luke.” Katie nodded then ran off again. “Are you sure-” He began to say, but Luke cut him off.

“ _Go_.” He encouraged, opening the door for him, “have fun.” 

“Right.” Jonathan grimaced then stepped outside into the sun.

Evan watched Jonathan’s hair ruffle with the wind, his eyes darted from the house to Evan’s car then down to his shoes as he approached. His dark jeans hugged him nicely and his white V-neck accentuated his tan. He looked good, fucking insanely good. Evan swallowed thickly.

“Hey,” Jonathan greeted when he opened the door and slid into the passenger seat. The awkward air was back between them, making Jonathan cringe inwardly.

“Afternoon.” Evan nodded, smile lighting his face. Jonathan forced himself to look away. “Good to go?”

“Yep.”

Evan fiddled with the radio as he pulled back out onto the road, eager to fill the silence with something, anything. The drive wasn’t too long, but it was long enough that Evan was getting antsy. He made small talk with Jonathan, asked about games and more about his daughter. Jonathan was more than happy to go on and on about Katie and Evan genuinely liked hearing him talk about her.

When they finally parked, Evan frowned. It was crowded, which he figured was because it was midafternoon on a Friday. Still, he climbed out of the car with Jonathan following suit. 

Jonathan whistled. Luke wasn’t lying about the view. “Nice, right?” Evan asked, inclining his head toward the busy pier. 

“Yeah, bet it’s prettier at night.” Jonathan said offhandedly. He imagined the lights gave it a special kind of touch and almost wished they’d come later. 

“Oh, definitely.” Evan agreed then began to walk down the sand and toward the pier. Jonathan trailed a little ways behind him, eventually catching up to walk beside him. 

“Hey, Evan?” Jonathan started, staring at his feet as they walked through the throng of people.

“Hmm?” Evan was looking around, seemingly distracted. 

“There was something I wanted to talk to you about.” Jonathan went on, very conscious of all the people around them. 

Evan looked over at him then, small smile tugging the corner of his mouth up. “What’s up?” He asked, slowing until they came to a stop further out along the pier. Jonathan searched for the right words, or any words at all, but nothing would come. He rubbed his lips together and stared down at his shoes. “Jon?” Evan asked, making Jonathan’s head snap up immediately. 

Evan noticed his mistake as suddenly as Jonathan did and he felt panic beginning to bubble up. “What’d you call me?” Jonathan asked slowly.

“Uh,” Evan laughed nervously, hand going to the back of his neck, “thing is I kinda know what you wanna talk about.” He said. 

Jonathan stared at him, “You knew.” He said rather than asked. Evan nodded. “For how long?” He asked.

“Whole time.” Evan admitted, avoiding Jonathan’s eyes. “Look, I just had a feeling, y’know? Like Luke stumbled over your name the first morning then you walked in and the look on your face… I just knew. I know you. I didn’t get why you were lying other than maybe your daughter, which for the record, I don’t care about. Not like I don’t care about her! But like, the fact that you have a daughter. I think that’s pretty cool. You’re a great dad from what I’ve seen and she’s really something.” Evan looked up at him, finding Jonathan gaping, “I was just going to go with it because I wanted you to be comfortable. I know you’ve been nervous about meeting up and I didn’t really mean to intrude like that, but _fuck_ , Jon. I can’t stay away from you.” Everything spilled out at once, like it always tended to do with Evan and he snapped his mouth shut when he finished, wishing he could swallow that last part back down.

Jonathan was looking at him like he was seeing him for the first time, an unreadable expression on his face. Evan shifted nervously. 

“What were you so afraid of?” Evan asked, not being able to take the silence. 

“I don’t know.” Jonathan admitted, eyebrows furrowing. He ran a hand through his hair then looked back up at Evan, “I worried you had all these expectations, that you would freak when you found out I had a daughter, that I wasn’t going to be what you wanted.” He flushed at the phrasing of that last bit. “I don’t know,” he said again, “it seems silly now because you knew without me even telling you and you just… don’t care.” 

“It’s not that I don’t care! I just, I-” Evan wiped his hands on his jeans, looked around, and sighed, “It never made a difference to me whether you were 5’6 or 6’3. I didn’t care whether your hair would be brown, blonde, red, or green. Maybe it never occurred to me that you could have children, but that doesn’t change anything either. If anything, it just makes me that much more sure of how I feel. I love the goofy side of you that comes out when you’re comfortable, the way the wind ruffles your hair, how you are with your daughter, your laugh… it’s just,” Evan shook his head, at a loss, “It’s always been you, y’know? Even when I didn’t know what you looked like, when you were just a voice and a character in a game. I’ve always gravitated toward you. You’ve always felt inevitable.”

“I think I’m in love with you.” Jonathan blurted, brain turning to mush at Evan’s confession, “Think I have been for years, but I never knew what to call it. Think that’s why I was scared to meet you, because I knew you were just, you were-”

Evan cut him off, stepping closer into his space and kissing him fiercely. It was not anything like Jonathan imagined their first kiss would go, he could feel Evan’s desperation and his relief, could feel his heart pounding against his chest much like his own. He didn’t know what to do with his hands so he balled them into fists in Evan’s shirt. Evan’s fingers slipped up his chest and neck, around to fist in the hair at the nape of his neck. Jonathan thought that was a good idea and copied him, running his fingers through Evan’s floppy hair. Evan’s tongue slid along the seam of Jonathan’s lips until he opened his mouth eagerly. He tasted like the tea he’d been drinking and like something addicting. Jonathan never wanted to stop, but he needed to breathe.

“Me too.” Evan breathed against his lips when they parted, both of them oblivious to the world around them. “I think I love you too.”

“Great.” Jonathan said, smiling widely when Evan laughed then they kissed again. And again and someone whistled, but Jonathan didn’t care. 

-

Evan stood in the airport, hoping he looked more enthusiastic than he felt. He wasn’t eager to see Jonathan go, but he knew they’d be seeing each other again soon. Luke clapped him on the shoulder, “You’re welcome.” He said smugly. Evan rolled his eyes and ignored him. 

“Hey,” he caught Jonathan’s wrist when he went to chase after Katie. Luke went instead, sweeping her up and tickling her until she was laughing and screaming. “I’ll miss you.” He said, pulling him close.

Jonathan chuckled, “You’re flying out in less than a month.” He reminded. 

“That’s too long.” Evan pouted.

“Is this what I have to deal with from now on?” Jonathan asked, amused. 

“It’s what you signed up for when you fell in love with me.” Evan said, grinning when Jonathan’s ears went red. 

“We’re going to miss our flight.” Jonathan complained, extracting himself from Evan’s hold. “I’ll text you, or call you, or skype you.”

“Or all three.”

“Or all three.” Jonathan agreed, “We’re, we’re doing this then?” He asked nervously.

“Oh yeah, definitely.” Evan leaned close to kiss him, keeping it chaste.

“Hey, Jon! Sometime today, brother. Know y’all have some catching up to do, but we gotta go!” Luke called. 

Jonathan hugged Evan tightly, still not wholly believing he wasn’t dreaming. Evan kissed the side of his head before letting him go. “See you.” He said. Jonathan nodded, lingered for a moment then ran to catch up to Luke and Katie. He looked back over his shoulder, feeling more hopeful than he could ever remember, and waved. 

“I told you so.” Luke said, elbowing him as they walked quickly to catch their flight. 

Jonathan smiled at his feet, “Yeah,” he said, “you did.”


End file.
